In a controversial move, the City of Sand Springs has approved the building of five new pharmacies in the River West shopping center. City Councilman Michael Phillips confirmed the decision in a statement to the press Friday morning.
“I’ve always said, you can never have too many pharmacies. They’re really the ultimate convenience and shopping experience. Not only do they cure your colds, they also offer greeting cards, snacks, children’s toys, and magazines. That’s basically all you need in life.”
The vote passed 6-1 with the lone dissenting voice coming from Councilman Jim Spoon, who owns two Spoon Drug locations in Sand Springs. “This is an obvious attempt to get back at me for not bringing a dessert to the City Council Christmas party,” said Spoon. “I honestly intended to, I just forgot! Ever since then, none of the other Councilors ever invite me over for poker night!”
Despite Spoon’s protests, Vice-Mayor John Fothergill was adamant that the decision was strictly in the best interests of the town. “Competition breeds success. With these five new pharmacies joining CVS in the development, our town is sure to begin thriving like never before.”
Mayor Mike Burdge was unavailable for comment as he is currently attempting to be the first man to run across the Pacific Ocean.